Two Pints of Stella and a Bluey!

This “cocktail of choice” was suggested to me before I went to a party a couple of months ago.

The context was a telephone conversation with another single dad friend. Being a bloke’s conversation it was fairly straight forward and to the point.

Me: “I’m off to a party later tonight”

Mate: “Bloody hell mate, what’s going on. You NEVER go out. Are you going to hook up with a 40 y/o MILF?”

Me: “Listen, I’ve been doing housework since the moment I got up. I’ve cooked, cleaned, ran around after kids and been to the splash and slide hour at the local pool. I’m knackered. Sex really is the last thing on my mind just now…you understand!”

Mate: “Bob Bob Bob – I know”, he said. (he doesn’t stutter by the way – he just sometimes says my name a lot – like it’s funny or something)…but you will be fine. Two pints of Stella and a bluey and you’ll be laughing”

After the phone call I remember thinking if I had two pints of Stella and a bluey now, I’d be asleep on the sofa in half an hour in a rather embarrassing position!

Anyway, I digress.

When Jane Garvey presented her ‘phone in on stay at home dads this morning during Woman’s Hour I think she missed a trick. And I’m not saying that because the ever wonderful and entertaining Keith got 5 minutes to talk about his ironing and I got a nano second in which I think I said “good morning” before I heard they were shifting to the news!

No. For me the programme only scratched the surface of some of the real frustrations and anxieties many single dads and SAHD’s feel. The word “emasculated” is one I hear a lot in the OnlyDads office. It is one used by brave and honest men and should have been teased out more.

What was it Keith said…”I don’t want to go on a bug hunt or make a collage with kids…I’d prefer to go to the pub.” Spot on mate!

Anyway – those are my thoughts. And by the way, before OnlyDads gets sued, that “cocktail of choice” comes as a suggestion from a man with no medical qualifications whatsoever!

But I am left wondering it works with pints of Marston’s Pedigree instead of Stella?

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About onlydads

Single Dad living near Totnes in Devon. I founded www.onlydads.org in 2007 and live with my daughters Priya, 14 and Anya 11. I write about single parenting, work, overcoming trials and tribulations and sometimes not overcoming trials and tribulations.
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One Response to Two Pints of Stella and a Bluey!

  1. I agree about the Woman’s Hour discussion. It was incredibly rushed. Their mission seemed to be to get as many SAHDs on as possible rather than explore the issue. I thought some of the dads were rather polyanna-ish. One guy said he ‘felt sorry’ for me because of what I was saying, arguing that I lived in London ‘where there are parks’ that I could ‘take the kids for bike rides’.
    He missed the point: it’s great going to the park and taking the kids for bike rides. But you can do that if you’re a working dad, too. It becomes rather relentless when your entire existence is child-focused. That’s what I would have liked to have said: it’s about balance.
    It’s not just SAHDs that feel it, but many SAHMs, too. Being a dad is immensely rewarding, but it involves a total sacrifice of the self. Some people are cut out for that – but I personally am not raising my children just so that their own fulfilment effectively ends the moment they have children. I want them to be accomplished as adults, not just as children.
    Anyway, a minor irritation on a day where having 5 minutes of fame was a lovely highlight 🙂
    And I’m with you on the cocktail concerns: blokes like us should stick to bitter and a rant.

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