Motherhood: A Dad’s View

CoffeeCurls tagged me for this post. I’m honoured!

It’s to do with Motherhood and was prepared around Mother’s Day. As many of you will appreciate, I have been raising my two daughters, Priya and Anya largely on my own for a number of years. In that time I have heard the expression “it must be hard being both mum and dad” more times than you could wave a stick at.

I am of course, not a mum. Although, in “old-money”, I have undertaken some “motherly duties”. But we now live with decimalisation. Old money is out. “Mothering” and “Fathering” is now best described as Parenting. I answer these questions, not as some kind of cross-dressing man/woman hybrid; rather, I answer as a man and a parent.

Does that make sense?

 Q1. Describe Motherhood in three words.

Wine. O. Clock.

Q2. Does your experience differ from your Mother’s – how?

My mum was – in every way – a traditional mum. Stay at home – cook – clean – make dinners. I have done some of that. My mum enjoyed it, I do only a “bit”.

Q3. What’s the hardest thing about being a mum? 

CoffeeCurls answered “The fear”.

I really get that!

I fear that my parenting isn’t good enough. A fear that my girls will look back and think that could have been a lot better.

A nagging doubt that I’m not doing quite good enough! I get that feeling lots!

Q4. What’s the best thing?

When your 15yo tells you that boys only want girls for “sex and to make them sandwiches”.

Raising a feminist is the way to go!

Between you and me – I do worry though that she may have a penchant for tubby lads who insist on her making sandwiches. That’s odd. I may have to worry about that (see above).

Q5. How has it changed you?

I’m not sure. I guess I feel I can turn my hand to anything. Multi-tasking! I can do that now.

Q6. What do you hope for your children?

I want them to enter the grown-up world with their head held high. Proud happy women.

They will (I can assure you) be telling men to make their own sodding sandwiches by the time I’m finished 🙂

Q7. What do you fear for them?

I have two fears:

  1. Growing up in a world where we expect (and accept) millions of people to live on a dollar a day. The world is morally bankrupt. It will be a hard place for them to truly flourish as human beings.
  2. They will be starting life with a Government that is made up of very rich men. Men who do not and will not care for poor girls. I will feed them confidence to tackle this. It may, or may not be enough?

Q8. What makes it all worthwhile?

My wonderful girls are growing-up (15 and almost 12). I see blossoming young women. It makes my heart sing.

Over to you MochaDad. Am really interested to hear what you answer!

About onlydads

Single Dad living near Totnes in Devon. I founded www.onlydads.org in 2007 and live with my daughters Priya, 14 and Anya 11. I write about single parenting, work, overcoming trials and tribulations and sometimes not overcoming trials and tribulations.
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2 Responses to Motherhood: A Dad’s View

  1. CoffeeCurls says:

    Great answers! I completely relate to the ‘nagging doubt I’m not quite good enough’ – part and parcel of being a caring parent I guess x

  2. onlydads says:

    Tis a funny thing. Even when you have a really good day, it’s still there!

    Thanks for the tag 🙂

    Bob x

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